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Showing posts with label Strong Marriage. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Strong Marriage. Show all posts

10 Ways to Put Romance in Your Marriage Everyday

A marriage is a wonderful relationship that allows you to explore yourself and another person. You will find that marriage can be easy, difficult, rewarding, frustrating, and everything in between all at the same time. One of the biggest complaints from people who have been married for some time is that the romance is gone. The following is a look at ten ways to put romance in your marriage everyday:

1. Kiss goodbye each time you leave. Too many married couples part for the day without a physical embrace of any kind. Try a kiss goodbye before you head out for your respective days away from each other. On occasion make it a steamy one. However, even a peck will help keep some of the romance in your marriage.

2. Say "I love you" each time you talk and end the conversation. This can be before you go to bed for the night, or it can be when you get off a phone conversation. Do not neglect to tell one another you love each other, you might regret it if you don't.

3. Have a few moments of alone time. One reason romance leaves a marriage is that with work, responsibilities, and children, often it is difficult to find the time for it. Make spending at least half an hour together, uninterrupted each day, a big priority.

4. Play together. Romance does not always have to come from gestures like flowers and candle lit dinners. Another great way to inspire romance is by playing with one another. This can be games, physical play, etc. It can be as simple as having a mini-water fight in the kitchen while you clean up the dinner dishes, or a tickle torture while you get ready for bed. Do not forget to have fun with one another.

5. Laugh together. Laughter inspires good feelings, contentment, and joy, all of which are necessary to have romance in a relationship. So, whether you laugh at or with each other, from a Laffy Taffy joke, or a funny television show, make sure there is laughter in your life each day.

6. Pinch butts. It may sound silly, but part of romance is feeling physically attracted to one another. When you make an effort to let your spouse know you are still physically attracted to them, whether by pinching their bum, or some other means, it can spark romantic feelings.

7. Touch is a critical element to romance. Hold hands while you drive, walk, etc. Hug one another, and make it a point to daily have some form of contact physically so that you never "lose touch" with your spouse.

8. Meals together is a great way to inspire romance. You do not have to have candle lit or intimate dinners, but you do have to have time together each day to talk, and to get to know one another more intimately (thoughts, dreams, goals, etc. as well as physically), and what better way than through eating meals with one another?

9. Service. Serving each other and doing thoughtful little things for one another is a great way to inspire romance in your marriage. This is especially helpful if you aren't feeling very romantically inclined.

10. Inside jokes, looks, etc. The more you share that is intimate and personal, the easier it is to have a romantic or intimate connection. So, wink at each other, share intimate secrets, and make efforts to improve your intimate bond.

By Beverly Frank

Saving a Christian Marriage from Divorce: Ten things you should know

It’s sad but true. All of us have been affected, either directly or indirectly, by divorce.

Recently, it was stated that: “While it may be alarming to discover that born again Christians are more likely than others to experience a divorce, that pattern has been in place for quite some time. Even more disturbing, perhaps, is that when those individuals experience a divorce many of them feel their community of faith provides rejection rather than support and healing. But the research also raises questions regarding the effectiveness of how churches minister to families. The ultimate responsibility for a marriage belongs to the husband and wife, but the high incidence of divorce within the Christian community challenges the idea that churches provide truly practical and life-changing support for marriages.” Barea Research Group

Remember God’s attitude about divorce “I hate it”. I pray that none of us regard divorce as a slapdash or indifferent disposition. While there are several important concepts or principals that can help prevent a Christian marriage from entering the divorce court; listed below are ten principals that I believe will be most helpful.

1. Sincere commitment of your life to Jesus Christ. By having a personal relationship with Jesus Christ at least three important opportunities become instantly available to you:

  • A personal relationship with Jesus Christ provides you with a fundamental understanding of what’s right and wrong
  • A personal relationship with Jesus Christ provides you comfort in the time of sorrow or when feeling “the blues”
  • A personal relationship with Jesus Christ can help to steer your life around corners and guide you through the blind spots
2. Commitment to a Christ-centered marriage. A Christ-centered marriage exhibits at least three behaviors:

  • A Christ-centered marriage demonstrates patience in the times of stress and challenge
  • A Christ-centered marriage walks with a heart of forgiveness and each spouse is able to do something for one another, that is beneficial to that spouse only
  • A Christ-centered marriage is slow to anger and responds to emotions without vindictive desires

3. Christian marriages make a “No matter what decisions”. A Christian marriage that strives to prevent divorce have the heart of a Daniel and demonstrates at least three behaviors:

  • A Christian marriage makes a “No matter what decision” by stating that they are willing to do what ever it will take to prevent divorce from occurring
  • A Christian marriage makes a “No matter what decision” and like Daniel demonstrates courage in the face of marital adversity and strife
  • A Christian marriage makes a “No matter what decision” like Daniel by persevering with a “Right heart condition or response” when tempted to make an easy wrong decision about the marriage instead of a hard right decision

4. Christian marriages take the word “divorce” out of their vocabulary. A Christian marriage that strives to prevent divorce understands that using the word divorce in their marriage encourages them to head to the divorce court in at least three ways:

  • Christian marriages understand that “Life and death are in the power of the tongue” (Proverbs 10:18-21; James 3:6).
  • Christian marriages understand that as long as you talk about divorcing, it becomes an option
  • Christian marriages understand that when arguments arise, we move in the path of least resistance; therefore if we are thinking about divorcing or using the word, it becomes the path of least resistance

5. Christian marriages that don’t divorce understands that their spouse can not meet all of their needs. A Christ-centered marriage that moves away from divorce understands that God alone is the ultimate fulfiller of their needs in three ways:

  • Christian marriages understands that it is God who gives you security and purpose in life
  • Christian marriages understands that it is God meets your physical needs and fills your hunger for love
  • Christian marriages understands that while their childhood development may have been inadequate (real or un-real), that they cannot expect their spouse to fulfill those unmet needs

6. Christian marriages that are not divorcing walk with a heart of forgiveness. These marriage demonstrate forgiveness in at least three ways:

  • Christian marriages understand that forgiveness starts as a choice of the heart and an act of free-will
  • Christian marriages understand that walking in forgiveness is a daily process
  • Christian marriages walk in forgiveness and move away from strife by not personally attacking their mate, tearing them down
7. Christian marriages that desire to not divorce are careful not to levy personal attacks against their spouse and they understand that:

  • Christian marriages understand the importance of using wisdom when addressing their mate, especially during times of frustration
  • Christian marriages understand that attacking their mate only escalates the situation
  • Christian marriages understand that using harsh words or exaggerating the situation decreases the opportunities to resolve the conflict

8. Christian marriages that prevent divorce from occurring in their marriages understand that their spouse is their helper and not their enemy, thus:

  • Christian marriages understand that when they speak harshly about their mate, their mate become an enemy
  • Christian marriages understand that marriage can be the closest thing to heaven (helper) or the closest thing to hell (enemy)
  • Christian marriages understand that having faulty expectations about their mate can encourage their mate to become an enemy when those expectations are not fulfilled

9. Christian marriages who are not divorcing understand the power of praise and prayer, especially intercessory prayer for their spouse. They understand that the definition of intercessory prayer could be stated as:

  • Christian marriages understands that it is Jesus Christ who sits at the right hand of God who makes intercession for us
  • Christian marriages understand the importance of praying on the behalf of their mate (intercessor)
  • Christian marriages understands the importance of becoming a mediator between God and their mate (intercessor)

10. Christian marriages that move away from divorce understands that counsel is beneficial especially when conflicts or convictions are challenging; therefore they:

  • Christian marriages will voluntary go for help (Gal. 2:1-2)
  • Christian marriages will seek out the assistance of professionals or those seasoned in leadership (Gal. 2: 2-9)
  • Christian marriages understand that all truth belongs to God (John 14:6)

By Dr. Tracy Scott

20 Ways to Make Your Spouse Smile

Do you want to put a smile on your spouse’s face today? Maybe make his/her day a little better. It won’t cost you a single penny or much time to do just that. And because smiling is contagious, it probably won’t just be one person you make smile today.

Here are 20 ways to turn that frown upside down.

1. Send some flowers to your spouse at work.
2. Compliment your spouse on their appearance.
3. Donate something to charity.
4. Take your spouse out to lunch/dinner.
5. Let him/her knows you miss him/her.
6. Make a surprise telephone call to your spouse at work, just to say hi.
7. Hold a door open for your spouse.
8. Hug your spouse for no reason.
9. Leave a joke on your spouse answer machine/mailbox.
10. Send a card to your spouse letting him/her knows how special he/she is.
11. Give up your seat on the train to your spouse when there aren’t any left.
12. Share your umbrella on a rainy day.
13. Ask your spouse if he/she needs anything while you’re out shopping.
14. When it’s raining, plan an indoor picnic with your spouse and children.
15. Leave a love letter somewhere where your spouse will find it.
16. Send your spouse an unusual and unexpected gift like chocolate, or flowers.
17. Tell your spouse you’re proud of him/her.
18. Tell your spouse you thought about him/her the other day.
19. Cook a surprise meal for your spouse one night, especially if he/she normally does the cooking.
20. Tell your spouse you love him/her.

Did you know it takes only 17 muscles to smile, but 43 to frown?

Why waste all that energy frowning when you could just smile.

Here are 5 more facts about smiling.

1. Women smile more than men.

2. Smiling releases endorpins that make us feel better.

3. We are all born with the ability to smile. It's not something we learn from others.

4. A smile is a universal expression of happiness.

5. A smiling person is thought to be a more pleasent, attractive, sociable, sincere and competent than a non-smiling person.



Love is A Choice

Love is a choice and the choice is up to you. Do you want the good things or the bad things. You need to choose the good things. Here is an article I found in a website I hope you will bless.

John 15:11-13

These things I have spoken to you, that My joy may remain in you, and that your joy may be full. This is My commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one's life for his friends.

Why does the Bible instruct us to love one another over and over again? Because God knows, we are the only one who can make the "choice" to Love, evereday of our lives!

We remember well the days of thinking that love was a "feeling"! Its just something that happens to you! That "feeling" you get, is because someone has CHOSEN to love you!

There is nothing magical about love. All the romance books and movies lead us all to believe that love is this special thing that only the "lucky" seem to have. Wrong...everybody is entitled to love.

The day we married our Pastor said "Each and every day you must wake up and choose to be married". Getting married does not mean everything will now take care of itself, because after all, we are now married. However, it is not so much work that it is a burden either.
When we choose to love our mates we are choosing to accept this person as another one of God's children, and the mate with which to spend our lifetime with.

Choosing to love means:

# I choose to Love my husband/wife
# I choose to be patient with my mate
# I choose to be kind to my mate
# I choose to please my mate
# I choose to forgive my mate
# I choose to honor my mate
# I choose to trust my mate
# I choose to be understanding to my mate
# I choose to grow with my mate
# I choose to encourage my mate
# I choose to help my mate
# I choose to be truthful to my mate
# I choose to be faithful to my mate
# I choose to be unselfish with my mate
# I choose to be hopeful with my mate
# I choose to speak in love to my mate
# I choose to be my spouse's mate the rest of my life!

What "Choice" have you made today?

Even if you are troubled in your marriage or your partner is not responding as you would like, we must still make the choice first in ourselves. Do not let your heart become hardend. Ask God for the strength for you to choose to "love" today. Expecting nothing in return, open your heart to the gift of Love.

A Marriage Prayer

Thank you Lord for the love you have given us. We thank you for giving us the power to make the choice to love. Help us dear Lord to see every day as a new beginning. We ask for your guidance in all the choices we make today. Let us treat each other as you would treat us. We Thank you for this marriage you have given to us, let us be ever mindful of the gift our marriage is from above.
In Jesus name we pray, Amen.